If you live your life by perfectionism, you probably have an overwhelming fear of making a mistake. And if you do make a mistake, maybe you:
- let that be an excuse to make a lot more mistakes (well, you didnāt do it perfectly so the heck with this) and/or
- give yourself permission to abandon yourself and quit.
Do yourself a kindness and let go of perfectionism because:
1. Youāre not going to do your life perfectly.
Hereās the thing: Youāre going to make mistakes no matter what you do.
Youāre going to screw things up. Youāre going to forget stuff. Youāre going to do things you know you shouldnāt. You might going running back to ways of doing things that didnāt work for you in the past but they feel familiar and so safer than blazing your own path.
Thereās just no perfection to be had. You couldnāt be perfect even if you tried really hard because of the simple fact that youāre human. Itās okay if you make mistakes. Youāre not alone. Instead, youāre in excellent company with the rest of us.
2. Perfectionism is about fear.
Itās been my experience that the need to be perfect or appear perfect has something to do with fear. So thatās the question you need to be asking: What am I afraid is going to happen if I screw this up?
- Are you afraid of how others will perceive you?
- Or what you believe mistakes/failures say about you as a person?
- Or maybe your self-worth is tied up in the illusion of being perfect (so if you make a mistake, you believe you lose value as a person)?
- Or [insert your own question about your fear here].
Once you figure out what that fear is, youāll have a much easier time letting yourself make mistakes.
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3. Perfectionism means you let mistakes derail you.
When you let your mistakes derail you, you come to a stop. You get afraid to take any action at all, for fear of making more mistakes, and thatās how you end up feeling stuck and not moving forward in your life. The longer you stay going around in circles with fear (where fear keeps you from taking action), the harder it gets for you to break the cycle, especially if youāre constantly replaying your mistakes in your head.
Know this: the ONLY difference between people who succeed and people who fail is that the ones who succeed donāt let their mistakes derail them.
4. Perfectionism doesn’t let you grow.
You can’t grow if you won’t let yourself screw up because you grow when you make mistakes then learn from them. Whenever you make a mistake, even if itās one that’s embarrassing or devastating or makes you want to cry, just remember this: you simply got a lesson in what didnāt work.
The only things you have to do are these:
- Take a deep breath in through your nose then let it out slowly through your mouth.
- Find the lesson in whatever it was that didnāt work.
- Come back at it again from a wiser perspective.
How To Overcome Perfectionism:
1. Remember: Only one thing matters when you make a mistake.
It doesnāt matter how many times youāve been knocked back down in the dirt. It really doesnāt. The only thing that matters is that you get back up again.
So do this:
- pick yourself back up
- dust yourself off
- donāt give up on yourself
- learn what you can
- and try again.
And you give yourself permission to do that right away. Donāt beat yourself up. Donāt stew in what you did wrong. Just forgive yourself and tell yourself that youāll do better next time because you will.
2. Know this: Success is on the other side of failure.
What you want most for your life really is within your grasp. So donāt you give up on yourself and quit.
All of us make mistakes. All of us fail at some point. Remember, you really are in excellent company.
The only way youāre ever going to get to where you want to be is if you keep going. Remember this too: it doesnāt matter how slowly you go as long as you donāt stop.
Get off the diet-go-round. Get on with your life.Ā®
Stop wishing, start doing.
Create your own weight loss before and after success story.
My weight loss transformation & how it can help you overcome perfectionism
You absolutely can break the diet cycle. I got free. Your life can be that way too.
I made my own path because I needed to get myself out of the crazy-making behavior I was having around food. I needed:
- no more dieting.
- no more restrictive eating.
- no weighing and measuring food.
- no off-limit foods.
- no more judgment around food.
- no more trying to figure out healthy eating or just what healthy foods to eat.
- no more judging my self-worth based on the scale.
- no more youāre-not-doing-it-perfectly diet rules that were only fueling my constant thinking about and obsession with food.
I needed to stop: searching for weight loss tips, wondering how to lose belly fat fast or how to lose weight fast, worrying about how to eat healthy or finding healthy snacks for weight loss, coming up with yet another healthy eating plan, trying to have quick weight loss, or forcing myself onto yet another weight loss diet. What I needed instead was to find, out of all the weight loss programs out there, the best weight loss program for me. Turns out, the best way to lose weight was to find out what works for me and do that.
- I’ve lost 160+ pounds naturally by simply trusting myself and listening to my intuition (mindful eating and eating intuitively).
- I have maintained that weight loss for 9 years and counting by trusting myself and listening to my intuition (mindful eating and intuitive eating).
- I no longer have any eating disorders, including bulimia (bulimia nervosa) and binge eating disorder (compulsive overeating).
- I no longer have a fear of food.
Just imagine what you could be doing with your life if you’d just commit to having your own before and after weight loss success story. You could be:Ā following your own dreams and reaching your own goals, cultivating your own passions, and making both your inner and outer worlds a more blissful and peaceful place.
I got that for my life. I want it for yours. I will teach you how.
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Let today be the day you make peace with your body and with food.
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